Hi Chase! First of all, I think the layout of your website is great. The content of the home page is minimal, but leads into your introduction well. And I like how the images are stylistically consistent. I also love the title, and I can't wait to see what you do with the stories. One thought I have is that your introduction doesn't really tell me what to expect from your storybook. It gives a great outline of what Dante's Inferno is, but it doesn't give the reader a lot of information about your interpretation of the theme (which I assume will be comedic!) I also might suggest looking at the language a little bit in your intro - it gets the point across really well, but it is a little informal. If that isn't your intention, you may want to think about rephrasing a little bit! Looking forward to your storybook.
I really enjoyed your introduction to Dante's Inferno. I look forward to reading the condensed version in this class. You did a great job of summarizing a fairly complex story into a digestible page that clearly outlines the books.
As Natalie mentioned, the intro did not really give any insight into what your storybook will look like. Obviously it is based upon Dante's Inferno, but there is not much context to give any idea about what to expect in the future.
Nonetheless, I look forward to reading your stories, and I am sure they will be great!
I like your storybook topic choice and the reasoning behind why you chose it. Hopefully you don't get caught up in other things and you're able to sit down and read at least some of Dante's Divine Comedy. As Natalie and Brady mentioned, your introduction is really just a brief look into Dante's Divine Comedy, not necessarily an introduction to your storybook. Maybe you misunderstood the instructions? Try looking at other storybooks for inspiration to spice up your introduction.
I know you're going to be able to put that classic Chase Gaddis charm into your storytelling and I look forward to seeing what you write!
Hey Chase, I find your storybook concept interesting. I made myself read Dante’s Inferno a few years back, and it was pretty good, although I’ve heard that it depends on the translation you use. As a psychology major interested in the psychology of fiction, I tend to think of Dante’s Inferno as the argument to the “fanfiction isn’t real literature!” I will say, while you seem to have a solid base, it’s not clear what you’re building on top of it. (I’m parroting what the others have commented.) As far as overall structuring, you might want to make sure you use paragraph breaks for future use. Having one big paragraph makes it difficult to read. Additionally, when I was clicking through your story pages, I noticed that they’re mislabeled (example: when I clicked on Story 1, the header told me it was Story 4 I was looking at). Also, I love the InferYES title. I actually laughed out loud.
I'm super excited to read some of your stories once you get them up on the site! I've always wanted to read The Divine Comedy and so this can be like a good prep course.
I really like the background info on the piece that you give in your intro -- I think giving the reader a little bit of background on what's to come is always beneficial. It just makes it a little bit easier to jump into things. If you're going to be changing up any of the elements from the original, maybe you could slip those details into your intro as well, just so we have some advance knowledge on what's coming our way.
I'd also love to see some more pictures on your home page in the same vein as what you've got elsewhere. Fire, inhabitants of Hell, whatever you want -- you've got a really cool aesthetic that you can play with and I think tweaking your site to make it look like the reader is actually IN Hell with your characters would be great. Maybe you make each story look like the reader is going to different levels/rings of Hell.
Also, just a small thing: I think the links to your different stories at the top of the site are a little bit off. They didn't always take me to the page they advertised. Just something to glance at.
First off, I loved your home page. The picture reflected The Inferno while your site title, “Inferyes” and the quote helped give it a light hearted twist. I am not sure if there are supposed to be pictures at the bottom or not but there were two squares that made it seem like there might be but they aren’t showing up. Of course, it could also be my laptop which doesn’t always show the pages correctly. Your intro gave me lots of information pertaining to the original story but once you have your stories written, you might move it into your author’s note and expand the intro of your own story so that readers know what to expect. It is really well written so I would definitely use it in your author’s notes to explain the original story. Also, as others have already said, your tabs don’t line up with the stories. Great beginning, I am eager to come back and read your stories.
Hi Chase, First of all, I really like your concept for this story. In your introduction, you did a really good job of giving a thorough background on Dante's Divine Comedy. I personally had only read Inferno so I was very interested to learn about the Purgatory and Heaven sections. I also really like the storytelling method you outline at the end of the introduction. I think the plot device you've decided on is really clever and an interesting way to bring Dante's Divine Comedy into the modern day. I like the design of you storybook but on the title page, there are two blank boxes that seem like they should have pictures in them? I would either put photos in there or just delete them. I also tried to click on your story tags and it was confusing because when I clicked on Story 1 it took me to page that had Story 4. So I think fixing those logistic problems will make a big difference. I'm excited to see this come together!
Hi Chase, I really liked your story. I caught that Paul's brothers, Peter and Luke, are named after apostles, which would make Paul Saul of Tarsus. So I'm excited to see his conversion. I appreciate that very subtle symbolism. I noticed that only the first story is available on your website. I'm wondering if this is a glitch because I was able to see and visit the other pages for the subsequent stories, but there was nothing written on those pages. Anyways I thought the story was very well-written and interesting. It's a really cool twist on a story that I've always thought was very interesting. Dante's inferno reminds me of this book from Chuck Palahniuk, the author of fight club, called Damned. I think the idea of hell is pretty fascinating and I can't wait to read more from you!
I enjoyed your story and I look forward to reading the other stories in your storybook. I am excited to see if Paul can in fact learn from his ways and I also relate to your characters due to the way how you have presented them. I enjoy the care package that you have created for Paul. The distance from his parents adds an essential element to your care package and really allows the reader to see Paul as a misunderstood teenager. I look forward to seeing what you create from this perspective and I also like the idea that you have for the levels that Paul will go through. When we were reading through storybooks at the beginning of the semester to determine our projects I remember reading one about Dante's Inferno and I also remember how bleak the story was. I admire that your story is not taking the bleak path that the other took but instead is offering your character redemption for his actions. Keep up the good work and cant wait to read more.
So as far as first impressions go, you really nailed it. I instantly am drawn into your site and the stories that fill it! I actually am not a fan of Dante's Divine Comedy but you shed a new light on it for me. I was surprised that I wanted to keep reading on the subject matter and that says a lot about your writing skills!
Chase, First let me say what a great start you have on your project! Design-wise, I think the aesthetics go quite well with the content you are writing. The introduction was really effective as well, and your attention to detail in your first chapter is exquisite as well. I think something you do really well is describe the characters in a way that your reader can identify with at least one of them, or even with the entire family in general. Your transitions between paragraphs are really smooth and the whole flow of the story is nice. I have just one suggestion for the first chapter; I think it would look bit more distinct if you put more room between the end of the story and your author's note, or maybe put the author's note in a different text box/section entirely. Having a little more space between what constitutes your story and what constitutes the background work (bibliography, author's note), can help the reader be more immersed in the story when you add more chapters in the future. Great start so far! I'm looking forward to reading more in the future.
Hey Chase! Taking on the Divine Comedy in a modern light is definitely an ambitious task. From the very beginning, the connection to the framing narrative becomes obvious, and the jump from classical to modern feels less than trivial. Your use of humorous comparisons and the way you establish character by contrast aids in the development of an almost whimsical feeling in the story, not unlike the source material. Not to mention, the Yelp review of a prison caught me off guard in a perfect manner. The way you use the differing levels of prison containment to allude to the circles of hell makes for a more understandable moral, especially to someone who may be unfamiliar with the "ordering" of sins in the Christian faith. Just as a quick note, you do need to update your links in the top right corner after you change the title of page, so that it doesn't just say "Story 1" etc., just to help your website look a little better.
Chase, I really enjoyed reading your story about the young man touring the prison with Judge Virgil. It was quite interesting, and I definitely was able to see the obvious parallels between Dante’s Inferno, and Paul’s tour of the prison. I think I would act similarly to Paul if I had to visit a prison with those sorts of inmates. I was curious if Paul actually straightens up or if he ends up becoming like one of the prisoners in the story. I also wonder if we should take youth on tours like this when they are younger. It might keep many of them out when they get older! All in all your story was great. It was easy to read, and a pretty fun read as well. I look forward to seeing what else you write, and I’ll definitely be coming back to check it out. Best of luck, Brady
Hey Chase, this is my first time running into your story, and I have to say I absolutely love the idea behind it. I have a copy of Dante's Divine Comedy and I've been trying to read it for the past year but I haven't set out enough time to do so, but I have a feeling your project will give me the push I need to do it. Onto your project though, I think you did a really good job with the introduction, it's very thorough and it gets your point across successfully. The way you've organized your stories is sound and it makes a lot of sense. Your actual retelling is pretty good. The stories are easy to follow and the imagery makes them very entertaining. Overall awesome job man, for real. Looking forward to reading the next stories.
I am back to read your stories so far. I felt like your website was set up well and it helped set the theme of your tales. Your first story was really well written and quickly caught my attention. I did notice a couple of small writing errors such as 'lawyer' should be plural and the part that began 'Paul, or more aptly his parents' was a bit confusing because it sounded like his parents were the ones who would be touring the penitentiary and such. Other than that, your first story was really great and I enjoyed it. It set the stage well for what's to come. As for your second story, it was also really captivating. I loved how it mirrored Dante's Inferno but in a modern way. They started off with the light crimes (just like the minor sins) and moved deeper. Again there were just a couple errors such as 'cold' instead of 'could'. Pretty basic things that I think you can fix quickly. Other than that, it was really great and I look forward to reading the rest when it comes!
Hi Chase, This week we are focusing on author's notes. I think you did a really goo job with your first author's note on providing the reader with a sense of where your entire project is going and not just restating what you already wrote. Actually, both of your notes were like this. Good job. I love how big the image is at the end of your first story. Maybe you could make the image on your next story the same size? I just think it has a cool effect. Your stories are so entertaining! I like that they are set in the modern world because it makes it really easy to picture the events. Your writing is so humorous and witty. You seem like you would be fun to have a conversation with. Good job with this project. I look forward to reading the rest of your work. Good luck with the rest of this semester! -Ann
Hey Chase, as promised I came back to see the progress in your story. Just like last time, I thoroughly enjoyed looking through your project. I want to start off saying a couple things I didn't get to last time. That joke you have about inferYES, is super corny but I lowkey love it. It works with the project and it takes away from the seriousness of the overall subject. I'm not one for puns, but I definitely support this one. Another thing I noticed and really enjoyed; the Italian? (I assume it's Italian since you got your inspiration form the Divine Comedy) titles add an elegance to the project that's very nice. Good call on that. The rehabilitation story was fun to read because it was such a modern approach to purgatory that still kept the roots of the belief. The way you modernize these topics that are quiet archaic is awesome.
Hey Chase! This is my first time getting to look through your semester project, and I have to admit I’ve always been a sucker for Dante, especially his Divine Comedy. I’m really glad that I got to look through your site! I think you did a great job of laying everything out. It was easy on the eyes, and I didn’t have any trouble finding where to go. Let’s get to the stories! I looked over all of them, but I spent the most amount of time on your second story. I did this mainly because while I have read all three books in the comedy, I am most familiar with the Inferno. I think you did a great job modernizing the work while at the same time keeping the tone and feel of the original. This is especially impressive since the Inferno was written in part as a social commentary. Great job!
Hi Chase! I am currently in the other class for Indian Epics, so this week I was excited to have the opportunity to explore the stories from your class, and I am very excited I got the chance to read yours! The title caught my attention because the book alone is so well known, I appreciate your use of the title to intrigue the reader and set me up for a storybook in your own perspective. I think your ability to add a more modern touch to these classic stories was refreshing because it allows the reader to become more connected with them while reading it! The comedy aspect you add into some places is very much appreciated as well because it makes it more enjoyable for me knowing a serious story has a sense of humor in a way! Great job!
Hey Chase, I enjoyed returning to see what your next story is about. I love the humor you added to it with the Karen/ Melanie bit. I also liked how Paul is warming up to Judge Virgil. He may be particular but he obviously cares enough about Paul to take him around, instead of just giving him a sentence and leaving him to the system. I feel sorry for the Rehabilitation Center which obviously needs some more help. That's a real problem in society, I think. Those sorts of places still have such a social stigma people avoid them, often until it is too late. Hopefully, Paul shapes up and never finds himself having to go to the Rehabilitation Center in the future. Or, he can go to one out of town with a good Yelp rating for some better help! Great job so far, I am excited to see where we will go from here! -Elyse
I have enjoyed the experience of reading your stories. I do think you could extend your author's notes more. I would like to see a descriptions of how your idea of your storybook originated more within those notes and I look forward to seeing your last story being presented. I also look forward to seeing your storybook come to a conclusion. I feel like your stories are coming along nicely and I find myself getting attached to your characters. Keep up the good work.
I have really enjoyed reading the Dante's Inferno storybook throughout the course of the semester. I am definitely planning to read it here in our last week of class. I knew a little bit about it going in, and from reading your stories, I think I am on the right track. Reading it later this week will help, but I really enjoyed your stories, and they have encouraged me to go on and read the story in this last week of class. I like how you made the story modern. From what I understand, Dante's stories are a bit dated, so it was cool to see a modern version of the stories. Sometimes it is really hard to take older stories and make them feel like they belong in our day and time. Especially with a story like this, I feel like it must have been tough. But it seems like you did a great job with it. Congrats on making it through the semester, and great work on the stories!
Hey Chase, I really love the layout of your blog. This is the first time I have come across your blog, since this semester. I do wish there were more pictures and images, but overall I love the theme and layout. The only note I have is I wish your author's note were a little more detailed. Maybe if you touched on how you were able to take the original story and put your own modern twist on it. Your own interpretations are so great and done so well. I feel like your stories are coming along very nicely, there so well written, and have such a great flow to them. Keep up the good work and hope you have a great rest of the semester.
Really great storybook that you have ended up here with at the end of the semester. I am a pretty big Dante fan, so I was way excited to explore through your three chapters as soon as I saw your blog as an option. And what a moving story it was! Getting a weekend judgement like Paul is a pretty heavy subject to start the journey off. I know that this is a hot-button topic in today's world, so props for addressing it. I think that is really important. I imagined that to be a fly on the wall for the lunch between Paul and the judge after their tour would have been pretty revealing. I wished a for a little more dialogue here, but in the true sense of Dante it makes sense that most of our narrative is received through setting and location. It seemed like the Story 4 link was dead, which was a shame as I was excited to see what would happen with Paul's trip. But overall I am just impressed with the angle you decided to take in writing these narrative. Props.
It pains me to say that I have actually never had the pleasure of reading your Storybook before. I am glad that I was able to read it before the end of the semester. Based on your title alone, I can tell that I am in for a good time!
A quick observation – on your homepage, you have two blocks that look like they had something or were supposed to have something for the reader to see. Is that the case? If not, please ignore my observation!
I really appreciate all of the information you have included in the introduction! You really went above and beyond there, and you gave the reader a detailed account of what to expect in your Storybook.
Overall, I really liked all of your stories! They were very interesting, and, quite honestly, really creative! I know this is the end for this project, but you should continue nurturing your writing talent elsewhere!
Hi Chase, Your introduction provides sufficient explanation for us to understand the rest of your story. On story 1 you did a great job setting up the basis for the rest of the storybook. From your writing we learn about Paul's actions and character, as well as the reasons behind his actions. We are also introduced to the judge who becomes an important character in the following stories. In story two, Paul and the judge's relationship is set up. We see that is is tense and uncomfortable bewteen them. We are also shown how affected Paul is by what he sees and are led to believe that by the end of story two he is a changed man, or at least he has had an experience he will never forget. Story three shows us that things are becoming less tense between the two. They are warming up to each other. Paul seems inspired by the visit to the rehabilitation center, making us think he has a good heart after all, and maybe he won't turn out so bad. Story four does a great job of wrapping things up and concluding the story. Paul and the judge form a friendship and the judge gives Paul advice on how apologizing and dealing with his parents. We know that Paul will be okay, because the judge has his back.
Hi Chase!
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, I think the layout of your website is great. The content of the home page is minimal, but leads into your introduction well. And I like how the images are stylistically consistent. I also love the title, and I can't wait to see what you do with the stories.
One thought I have is that your introduction doesn't really tell me what to expect from your storybook. It gives a great outline of what Dante's Inferno is, but it doesn't give the reader a lot of information about your interpretation of the theme (which I assume will be comedic!)
I also might suggest looking at the language a little bit in your intro - it gets the point across really well, but it is a little informal. If that isn't your intention, you may want to think about rephrasing a little bit!
Looking forward to your storybook.
Hey Chase,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your introduction to Dante's Inferno. I look forward to reading the condensed version in this class. You did a great job of summarizing a fairly complex story into a digestible page that clearly outlines the books.
As Natalie mentioned, the intro did not really give any insight into what your storybook will look like. Obviously it is based upon Dante's Inferno, but there is not much context to give any idea about what to expect in the future.
Nonetheless, I look forward to reading your stories, and I am sure they will be great!
Good luck,
Brady
Hi Chase!
ReplyDeleteI like your storybook topic choice and the reasoning behind why you chose it. Hopefully you don't get caught up in other things and you're able to sit down and read at least some of Dante's Divine Comedy.
As Natalie and Brady mentioned, your introduction is really just a brief look into Dante's Divine Comedy, not necessarily an introduction to your storybook. Maybe you misunderstood the instructions? Try looking at other storybooks for inspiration to spice up your introduction.
I know you're going to be able to put that classic Chase Gaddis charm into your storytelling and I look forward to seeing what you write!
Hey Chase, I find your storybook concept interesting. I made myself read Dante’s Inferno a few years back, and it was pretty good, although I’ve heard that it depends on the translation you use. As a psychology major interested in the psychology of fiction, I tend to think of Dante’s Inferno as the argument to the “fanfiction isn’t real literature!” I will say, while you seem to have a solid base, it’s not clear what you’re building on top of it. (I’m parroting what the others have commented.) As far as overall structuring, you might want to make sure you use paragraph breaks for future use. Having one big paragraph makes it difficult to read. Additionally, when I was clicking through your story pages, I noticed that they’re mislabeled (example: when I clicked on Story 1, the header told me it was Story 4 I was looking at). Also, I love the InferYES title. I actually laughed out loud.
ReplyDeleteHey, Chase!
ReplyDeleteI'm super excited to read some of your stories once you get them up on the site! I've always wanted to read The Divine Comedy and so this can be like a good prep course.
I really like the background info on the piece that you give in your intro -- I think giving the reader a little bit of background on what's to come is always beneficial. It just makes it a little bit easier to jump into things. If you're going to be changing up any of the elements from the original, maybe you could slip those details into your intro as well, just so we have some advance knowledge on what's coming our way.
I'd also love to see some more pictures on your home page in the same vein as what you've got elsewhere. Fire, inhabitants of Hell, whatever you want -- you've got a really cool aesthetic that you can play with and I think tweaking your site to make it look like the reader is actually IN Hell with your characters would be great. Maybe you make each story look like the reader is going to different levels/rings of Hell.
Also, just a small thing: I think the links to your different stories at the top of the site are a little bit off. They didn't always take me to the page they advertised. Just something to glance at.
I'm looking forward to reading more!
Hey Chase,
ReplyDeleteFirst off, I loved your home page. The picture reflected The Inferno while your site title, “Inferyes” and the quote helped give it a light hearted twist. I am not sure if there are supposed to be pictures at the bottom or not but there were two squares that made it seem like there might be but they aren’t showing up. Of course, it could also be my laptop which doesn’t always show the pages correctly. Your intro gave me lots of information pertaining to the original story but once you have your stories written, you might move it into your author’s note and expand the intro of your own story so that readers know what to expect. It is really well written so I would definitely use it in your author’s notes to explain the original story. Also, as others have already said, your tabs don’t line up with the stories. Great beginning, I am eager to come back and read your stories.
-Elyse
Hi Chase,
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, I really like your concept for this story. In your introduction, you did a really good job of giving a thorough background on Dante's Divine Comedy. I personally had only read Inferno so I was very interested to learn about the Purgatory and Heaven sections. I also really like the storytelling method you outline at the end of the introduction. I think the plot device you've decided on is really clever and an interesting way to bring Dante's Divine Comedy into the modern day. I like the design of you storybook but on the title page, there are two blank boxes that seem like they should have pictures in them? I would either put photos in there or just delete them. I also tried to click on your story tags and it was confusing because when I clicked on Story 1 it took me to page that had Story 4. So I think fixing those logistic problems will make a big difference. I'm excited to see this come together!
Hi Chase, I really liked your story. I caught that Paul's brothers, Peter and Luke, are named after apostles, which would make Paul Saul of Tarsus. So I'm excited to see his conversion. I appreciate that very subtle symbolism. I noticed that only the first story is available on your website. I'm wondering if this is a glitch because I was able to see and visit the other pages for the subsequent stories, but there was nothing written on those pages. Anyways I thought the story was very well-written and interesting. It's a really cool twist on a story that I've always thought was very interesting. Dante's inferno reminds me of this book from Chuck Palahniuk, the author of fight club, called Damned. I think the idea of hell is pretty fascinating and I can't wait to read more from you!
ReplyDeleteHi Chase,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed your story and I look forward to reading the other stories in your storybook. I am excited to see if Paul can in fact learn from his ways and I also relate to your characters due to the way how you have presented them. I enjoy the care package that you have created for Paul. The distance from his parents adds an essential element to your care package and really allows the reader to see Paul as a misunderstood teenager. I look forward to seeing what you create from this perspective and I also like the idea that you have for the levels that Paul will go through. When we were reading through storybooks at the beginning of the semester to determine our projects I remember reading one about Dante's Inferno and I also remember how bleak the story was. I admire that your story is not taking the bleak path that the other took but instead is offering your character redemption for his actions. Keep up the good work and cant wait to read more.
Hey Chase,
ReplyDeleteSo as far as first impressions go, you really nailed it. I instantly am drawn into your site and the stories that fill it! I actually am not a fan of Dante's Divine Comedy but you shed a new light on it for me. I was surprised that I wanted to keep reading on the subject matter and that says a lot about your writing skills!
Chase,
ReplyDeleteFirst let me say what a great start you have on your project! Design-wise, I think the aesthetics go quite well with the content you are writing. The introduction was really effective as well, and your attention to detail in your first chapter is exquisite as well. I think something you do really well is describe the characters in a way that your reader can identify with at least one of them, or even with the entire family in general. Your transitions between paragraphs are really smooth and the whole flow of the story is nice. I have just one suggestion for the first chapter; I think it would look bit more distinct if you put more room between the end of the story and your author's note, or maybe put the author's note in a different text box/section entirely. Having a little more space between what constitutes your story and what constitutes the background work (bibliography, author's note), can help the reader be more immersed in the story when you add more chapters in the future. Great start so far! I'm looking forward to reading more in the future.
Hey Chase!
ReplyDeleteTaking on the Divine Comedy in a modern light is definitely an ambitious task. From the very beginning, the connection to the framing narrative becomes obvious, and the jump from classical to modern feels less than trivial. Your use of humorous comparisons and the way you establish character by contrast aids in the development of an almost whimsical feeling in the story, not unlike the source material. Not to mention, the Yelp review of a prison caught me off guard in a perfect manner. The way you use the differing levels of prison containment to allude to the circles of hell makes for a more understandable moral, especially to someone who may be unfamiliar with the "ordering" of sins in the Christian faith.
Just as a quick note, you do need to update your links in the top right corner after you change the title of page, so that it doesn't just say "Story 1" etc., just to help your website look a little better.
Chase,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed reading your story about the young man touring the prison with Judge Virgil. It was quite interesting, and I definitely was able to see the obvious parallels between Dante’s Inferno, and Paul’s tour of the prison. I think I would act similarly to Paul if I had to visit a prison with those sorts of inmates. I was curious if Paul actually straightens up or if he ends up becoming like one of the prisoners in the story. I also wonder if we should take youth on tours like this when they are younger. It might keep many of them out when they get older! All in all your story was great. It was easy to read, and a pretty fun read as well. I look forward to seeing what else you write, and I’ll definitely be coming back to check it out.
Best of luck,
Brady
Hey Chase, this is my first time running into your story, and I have to say I absolutely love the idea behind it. I have a copy of Dante's Divine Comedy and I've been trying to read it for the past year but I haven't set out enough time to do so, but I have a feeling your project will give me the push I need to do it. Onto your project though, I think you did a really good job with the introduction, it's very thorough and it gets your point across successfully. The way you've organized your stories is sound and it makes a lot of sense. Your actual retelling is pretty good. The stories are easy to follow and the imagery makes them very entertaining. Overall awesome job man, for real. Looking forward to reading the next stories.
ReplyDeleteHey Chase,
ReplyDeleteI am back to read your stories so far. I felt like your website was set up well and it helped set the theme of your tales. Your first story was really well written and quickly caught my attention. I did notice a couple of small writing errors such as 'lawyer' should be plural and the part that began 'Paul, or more aptly his parents' was a bit confusing because it sounded like his parents were the ones who would be touring the penitentiary and such. Other than that, your first story was really great and I enjoyed it. It set the stage well for what's to come.
As for your second story, it was also really captivating. I loved how it mirrored Dante's Inferno but in a modern way. They started off with the light crimes (just like the minor sins) and moved deeper. Again there were just a couple errors such as 'cold' instead of 'could'. Pretty basic things that I think you can fix quickly. Other than that, it was really great and I look forward to reading the rest when it comes!
-Elyse
Hi Chase,
ReplyDeleteThis week we are focusing on author's notes. I think you did a really goo job with your first author's note on providing the reader with a sense of where your entire project is going and not just restating what you already wrote. Actually, both of your notes were like this. Good job.
I love how big the image is at the end of your first story. Maybe you could make the image on your next story the same size? I just think it has a cool effect.
Your stories are so entertaining! I like that they are set in the modern world because it makes it really easy to picture the events. Your writing is so humorous and witty. You seem like you would be fun to have a conversation with. Good job with this project. I look forward to reading the rest of your work.
Good luck with the rest of this semester!
-Ann
Hey Chase, as promised I came back to see the progress in your story. Just like last time, I thoroughly enjoyed looking through your project. I want to start off saying a couple things I didn't get to last time. That joke you have about inferYES, is super corny but I lowkey love it. It works with the project and it takes away from the seriousness of the overall subject. I'm not one for puns, but I definitely support this one. Another thing I noticed and really enjoyed; the Italian? (I assume it's Italian since you got your inspiration form the Divine Comedy) titles add an elegance to the project that's very nice. Good call on that. The rehabilitation story was fun to read because it was such a modern approach to purgatory that still kept the roots of the belief. The way you modernize these topics that are quiet archaic is awesome.
ReplyDeleteHey Chase!
ReplyDeleteThis is my first time getting to look through your semester project, and I have to admit I’ve always been a sucker for Dante, especially his Divine Comedy. I’m really glad that I got to look through your site! I think you did a great job of laying everything out. It was easy on the eyes, and I didn’t have any trouble finding where to go.
Let’s get to the stories! I looked over all of them, but I spent the most amount of time on your second story. I did this mainly because while I have read all three books in the comedy, I am most familiar with the Inferno.
I think you did a great job modernizing the work while at the same time keeping the tone and feel of the original. This is especially impressive since the Inferno was written in part as a social commentary. Great job!
Hi Chase! I am currently in the other class for Indian Epics, so this week I was excited to have the opportunity to explore the stories from your class, and I am very excited I got the chance to read yours! The title caught my attention because the book alone is so well known, I appreciate your use of the title to intrigue the reader and set me up for a storybook in your own perspective. I think your ability to add a more modern touch to these classic stories was refreshing because it allows the reader to become more connected with them while reading it! The comedy aspect you add into some places is very much appreciated as well because it makes it more enjoyable for me knowing a serious story has a sense of humor in a way! Great job!
ReplyDeleteHey Chase,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed returning to see what your next story is about. I love the humor you added to it with the Karen/ Melanie bit. I also liked how Paul is warming up to Judge Virgil. He may be particular but he obviously cares enough about Paul to take him around, instead of just giving him a sentence and leaving him to the system.
I feel sorry for the Rehabilitation Center which obviously needs some more help. That's a real problem in society, I think. Those sorts of places still have such a social stigma people avoid them, often until it is too late. Hopefully, Paul shapes up and never finds himself having to go to the Rehabilitation Center in the future. Or, he can go to one out of town with a good Yelp rating for some better help!
Great job so far, I am excited to see where we will go from here!
-Elyse
I have enjoyed the experience of reading your stories. I do think you could extend your author's notes more. I would like to see a descriptions of how your idea of your storybook originated more within those notes and I look forward to seeing your last story being presented. I also look forward to seeing your storybook come to a conclusion. I feel like your stories are coming along nicely and I find myself getting attached to your characters. Keep up the good work.
ReplyDeleteHey Chase,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed the layout of your page, except that I could not see the two pictures on the home page. I absolutely love Dante and took a class about Inferno, Purgatorio, and Paradiso, I believe a year ago at OU. I'm in the Indian Epics class and figured that I would wander over to the Myth-Folklore side as well. I thought that each of your story constructions were great and that overall, it was just well written. I would just check on the pictures and probably fleshout your author's notes a bit. I believe that you added a modern touch very well and didn't make it cliché like others would. Each story follows the path of Dante well, but doesn't copy it in the way a reader would expect when they only know the topic. Your introduction was very well thought-out and full of detail that is needed. Overall, you did a wonderful job and keep up the great work!
Hey Chase,
ReplyDeleteI have really enjoyed reading the Dante's Inferno storybook throughout the course of the semester. I am definitely planning to read it here in our last week of class. I knew a little bit about it going in, and from reading your stories, I think I am on the right track. Reading it later this week will help, but I really enjoyed your stories, and they have encouraged me to go on and read the story in this last week of class.
I like how you made the story modern. From what I understand, Dante's stories are a bit dated, so it was cool to see a modern version of the stories. Sometimes it is really hard to take older stories and make them feel like they belong in our day and time. Especially with a story like this, I feel like it must have been tough. But it seems like you did a great job with it. Congrats on making it through the semester, and great work on the stories!
Brady
Hey Chase,
ReplyDeleteI really love the layout of your blog. This is the first time I have come across your blog, since this semester. I do wish there were more pictures and images, but overall I love the theme and layout. The only note I have is I wish your author's note were a little more detailed. Maybe if you touched on how you were able to take the original story and put your own modern twist on it. Your own interpretations are so great and done so well. I feel like your stories are coming along very nicely, there so well written, and have such a great flow to them. Keep up the good work and hope you have a great rest of the semester.
Hey howdy Chase,
ReplyDeleteReally great storybook that you have ended up here with at the end of the semester. I am a pretty big Dante fan, so I was way excited to explore through your three chapters as soon as I saw your blog as an option. And what a moving story it was! Getting a weekend judgement like Paul is a pretty heavy subject to start the journey off. I know that this is a hot-button topic in today's world, so props for addressing it. I think that is really important. I imagined that to be a fly on the wall for the lunch between Paul and the judge after their tour would have been pretty revealing. I wished a for a little more dialogue here, but in the true sense of Dante it makes sense that most of our narrative is received through setting and location. It seemed like the Story 4 link was dead, which was a shame as I was excited to see what would happen with Paul's trip. But overall I am just impressed with the angle you decided to take in writing these narrative. Props.
Hello, Chase!
ReplyDeleteIt pains me to say that I have actually never had the pleasure of reading your Storybook before. I am glad that I was able to read it before the end of the semester. Based on your title alone, I can tell that I am in for a good time!
A quick observation – on your homepage, you have two blocks that look like they had something or were supposed to have something for the reader to see. Is that the case? If not, please ignore my observation!
I really appreciate all of the information you have included in the introduction! You really went above and beyond there, and you gave the reader a detailed account of what to expect in your Storybook.
Overall, I really liked all of your stories! They were very interesting, and, quite honestly, really creative! I know this is the end for this project, but you should continue nurturing your writing talent elsewhere!
Hi Chase,
ReplyDeleteYour introduction provides sufficient explanation for us to understand the rest of your story.
On story 1 you did a great job setting up the basis for the rest of the storybook. From your writing we learn about Paul's actions and character, as well as the reasons behind his actions. We are also introduced to the judge who becomes an important character in the following stories.
In story two, Paul and the judge's relationship is set up. We see that is is tense and uncomfortable bewteen them. We are also shown how affected Paul is by what he sees and are led to believe that by the end of story two he is a changed man, or at least he has had an experience he will never forget.
Story three shows us that things are becoming less tense between the two. They are warming up to each other. Paul seems inspired by the visit to the rehabilitation center, making us think he has a good heart after all, and maybe he won't turn out so bad.
Story four does a great job of wrapping things up and concluding the story. Paul and the judge form a friendship and the judge gives Paul advice on how apologizing and dealing with his parents. We know that Paul will be okay, because the judge has his back.